Everybody's an expert -- even when they're not....

I am finding myself finding ever deeper enjoyment in simple things:

Mowing the lawn. Looking at my sweetie for extended periods of time while she doesn't know I'm watching. Reworking old compositions on guitar. Counting the shades of green. Sitting cat-in-lap on couch. Having extended conversations with our older dog.

And there are the things that aren't as good. Grownup things:

Feeling that ache of wanting to take care of everybody and everything by somehow keeping all pain away. Worrying about pain I know is going to be coming, and how to keep that pain away for as long as possible. How to get people you love to believe that you really know what you say you know. Bouts of sobriety.

I think the "old soul" term may come to fit many of us, but in my case I think that I am finding some of what is really important at this late date. For a large portion of my life I have been simply an over-opinionated idiot with nothing to back it up. Here is hoping that at least most of that stops here. I realize that to some, overzealous opinionating is what a blog is for. So here are some intentionally vague points:

There a few things that I am very certain of, many things that I am not -- and not certain of....

I come from the educated side of an Independent Baptist background. The "Independent" is there for a reason, as they are an opinionated bunch, with a dead-certainty on a lot of subjects that cannot be conclusively proven. But there aren't many churches where the Pastor regularly uses multiple translations and compares them to the Greek and Hebrew, and publicly challenges his congregation to further their education and question authority, either. So that's a plus. Which leads to this:

I am alternately perplexed and amused by people who seem so dead-certain-right on subjects that that have multitudes of experts lining up on a multiplicity of sides. Not that I don't think you can arrive at certainty on many things (Relativism is escapism through denial of personal responsibility, IMHO.), but the particular brand of pseudo-intellectual certainty that seems to pervade the blog-O-sphere just ends up confusing me. I read extensive posts full of just-has-to-be-this-way opinions, and then I have to check it somewhere. And then I often end up confused, because even the "real world" reality experts can't agree, but somehow there is this person on a blog that "really knows".

So here's the kicker: I’m going to look for footnotes. I'm going to make it a point to read people who don't claim expertise, and who keep their lecturing to a minimum, and who don't let their readers drag them down the track of Blog-O-sphere Expert.

And maybe I'll just sit here with either a guitar or cat on my lap.

Have I made myself clear?

Probably not.